The Illusion of Togetherness

Recently, at the airport’s DigiYatra gate, my husband and daughter were ahead of me. They cleared the check and moved forward. When I tried to check in, the system repeatedly displayed, “No face identified.” Multiple attempts were rejected.

At that moment, even though my loved ones were nearby, they could not really help me. Eventually, I cleared the check, but the incident left me thinking deeply.

Isn’t this similar to our day-to-day life as human beings?

Nowadays, we often hear about “solo trips” and how they are adventurous, educative, and contribute to emotional independence and inner strength. This is undoubtedly true. During solo journeys, we learn to manage everything on our own. They help reduce our dependency on others for every small matter.

But on a deeper level, aren’t we actually on a solo journey every single day and every single moment?

Think about a prospective mother entering an operation theatre. She knows that inside the OT, it is ultimately her own battle to bring a healthy child into the world. Her loved ones may wait outside anxiously, praying for her, but there is very little they can actually do in that moment.The same holds true for most medical procedures.

Have you ever visited a board exam centre? Parents stand outside the gates to support their children, but once inside, it is the child alone who has to write the exam and succeed.

Similarly, in life, every moment, every incident, every event, and every experience is ultimately our own journey. Just as we have to breathe for ourselves, life too has to be lived by ourselves.

Most of the time, we live under the comforting illusion that our friends, family, and loved ones will walk beside us till the very end. But the reality is that every person is ultimately alone in fighting their own battles in the best way they can.

Many times, despite having the intention to help, one person may simply not be available, and the other has to move ahead alone and do whatever is required.

We see so many families where members work in different parts of the world. The lady of the house often manages the home, children, office responsibilities, and countless other duties largely on her own. At the same time, the family member travelling or working away is also independently carrying a different set of responsibilities and struggles.

In many ways, relationships are not about carrying someone else’s life for them — they are about walking beside each other for some distance while each person continues carrying their own invisible load.

Perhaps this is why some of the deepest battles of life are silent. People may stand beside us physically, yet certain journeys within us have to be travelled alone.

Even spiritual growth is deeply personal. A teacher may guide us, books may inspire us, loved ones may support us, but ultimately every individual has to face their own mind, heal their own wounds, understand their own patterns, and discover their own truth.

Maybe that is why life repeatedly puts us in situations where we are forced to rely on ourselves — not to isolate us, but to introduce us to our own inner strength.

And perhaps true maturity comes when we stop expecting complete emotional rescue from others. Not because people do not love us, but because every soul has its own lessons, responsibilities, limitations, and karmic path to walk.

Ironically, when we truly understand the aloneness of human existence, we begin to value relationships more deeply — not from dependency, but from gratitude. We stop demanding that others complete us and start appreciating their presence as companionship rather than ownership.

To sum up..Life itself is an interesting solo journey hidden within the illusion of togetherness.The sooner we realise this, the sooner we begin to introspect and understand ourselves better. We start working on our weaknesses and harnessing our strengths.

Love all. Serve all. Interact with people wholeheartedly. But remember ,in the deepest corners of life, you yourself are your own truest friend, strongest support, and lifelong companion.